not given to wine, not violent, not greedy for money, but gentle, not quarrelsome, not covetous; (I Timothy 3:3 NKJV)

It shouldn’t be about the money. Money is very important. You need it to get things done in the real world. One of the responsibilities that fall on leaders is discretion for judicial and effective administration of financial resources. But then you’ve got to have money to manage money, so the first thing for a leader when it comes to finances is getting it. This, however, is not to be done at any cost.

Imagine a football coach so obsessed with scoring he tells his team to do it by any means necessary, even if it means kicking their opponents in the groin and pushing their opponents goal keeper off the goal post?????? That’s what greed and covetousness look like. Leaders should not be greedy and they shouldn’t desire to get money “by any means necessary”. If you do that as a leader, you have failed already. Whenever you hear the statement “by any means necessary”, you get the impression that somebody has decided to throw restraint out the window. It means somebody no longer gives a care what is acceptable or considerate. I want it and nothing else matters, end of story. It’s called covetousness. It’s called greed. It smells bad!

A leader with such character can never be trusted, so don’t allow a greedy or covetous person to lead. The bible calls them “hirelings”; hired hands. They’re in it for what they can get, so they’ll never stick out their neck, or go the extra mile, or take one for the team. If it ain’t putting something in their wallet, it ain’t worth the trouble.
Do you want to be trusted as a leader? Then you must prove you’re in it to serve and not to be served.

Leaders should play all the cards they’ve got, then that’s it, especially for spiritual leaders. Patience comes highly recommended. It is speed you need not haste. Be prompt and patient as well. Whatever you do, stay on the road! Don’t take a short cut through the bushes. Stay on the road!



A bishop then must be blameless, the husband of one wife, temperate, sober-minded, of good behavior, hospitable, able to teach; not given to wine, not violent, not greedy for money, but gentle, not quarrelsome, not covetous; (I Timothy 3:2, 3 NKJV)

The more quarrels a leader picks the more people he drops. As a leader, you want to get along with people as much as possible. You want to maintain good relationship with people and avoid quarrels. Violence is never an option. Learn from Jesus Christ.

Quarrelling sends out the wrong signals and you want to avoid that. Why should people follow you in the first place if you get along with nobody? More importantly, an out of control leader is an accident waiting to happen. Who in their right mind would want to stick around for the crash? Peace, I mean inner peace is a protective shield for the mind and heart. A leader needs that very much. Without it his defences are breached, he can make mistakes, make wrong choices, say the wrong things and get himself and others pumped full of negative emotions, instead of love.

Leaders should be able to spot faults easily, but not to become fault finders. Leaders identify faults and find solutions. A leader who quarrels a lot soon wears his people out.
Leaders should be leaders, not opponents or competitors. Teach and instruct, avoid arguing! Arguments produce winners and losers. But a leader wants hearts that are willing to follow and full of respect for his leadership.
Now, leaders should avoid coming across as feeling so high and lofty about themselves, nevertheless, they can’t afford to appear “no better” than those they lead. You argue with colleagues. Anybody you argue with levels up with you. It’s like that. That’s why quarrelsome people are rarely held in high esteem. And a leader must be esteemed among the people.


A bishop then must be blameless, the husband of one wife, temperate, sober-minded, of good behavior, hospitable, able to teach; not given to wine, not violent, not greedy for money, but gentle, not quarrelsome, not covetous; (I Timothy 3:2, 3 NKJV)

Easy on the booze right there! My cousin made this joke one day about alcohol. We were at the mall to pick up a few things and we were walking past the wine section, all of a sudden she is pointing at the shelves with her head turned towards me, and with a tone like that of a needy little child she’s goes “They’re calling me!” Hahahaha Boy we had a great laugh about it.

If you are a leader and wine calls out to you, it is in your best interest not to answer. It will do you much harm if you do. Keep far away from alcohol because topers have no place in leadership. Easy on the booze sir! You don’t want to sabotage yourself.

Have you noticed that it is the very thing you have, the very thing you are able to manage and grow, it is that very thing that you get more and more of? If you lack money, the little you have gets taken away from you by events and situations. If you have money people want to give you more. If you are wise in some way, it leads you to more wisdom and people want to share their own wisdom with you. If you are good at fights and quarrels, opportunities for that just keeps coming. Jesus says, “he who has, more will be given to him, but he who does not have, even the little he has will be taken from him.”

Self-respect is a leaders jewel. It’s something every leader needs to guard like a bank guards its vault. That is what supplies the respect his people accord him. If a leader allows his self-respect to depreciate in value, the respect he gets from people goes out the window with it. Remember, “he who does not have, even the little he has will be taken away from him”. Proverbs 20:1 says, “wine is a mocker…” Don’t let yourself be deceived and robbed of your self-respect by it. Avoid the bottles and don’t fancy the bubbles. Never get drunk, sir!


A bishop then must be blameless, the husband of one wife, temperate, sober-minded, of good behavior, hospitable, able to teach; (I Timothy 3:2 NKJV)

You’ve got to put it into words…A lot is expected of leaders, a lot that has to do with modelling what is expected of followers and cultivating oneself to lead successfully. In addition to all that, a leader must be able to translate expectations into words to educate and instruct the people. The ability and inclination to communicate the journey unambiguously and understandably is very necessary for leadership.

A leader must be apt to teach. It is a leaders job to talk the talk, give the instruction, offer the correction, do the rebuking, explain the goal and describe the destination. He has got to be able to put what it is he is trying to do into words. He will not assume that the people know, he will not expect them to find out on their own, he understands it is his job to lead, using his life and his words as tools.

I have never read of a dumb General, a coach that can’t talk or a ship captain known for his silence on the deck. In fact, the ability to talk is considered priority for these leadership roles. A Christian leader must know how to interpret the bible for practical application in all aspects and situations of life. He must be able to use it, as a ship captain uses a compass to guide the followers through life on earth, while living in expectation of their masters return.
A Christian leader who cannot educate his people to live successfully on earth using the bible is not fit to take them to heaven, for the road to heaven goes through the earth. Let such a leader do as Paul advised Timothy, let him study to prove himself a qualified handler of the truth, one who knows what he is talking about.


A bishop then must be blameless, the husband of one wife, temperate, sober-minded, of good behavior, hospitable, able to teach; (I Timothy 3:2 NKJV)

People will give you a lot, sometimes everything for treating them right. There are very few ways to express value for people, one of them is how we feel about receiving them. The way a man feels about guests tell a lot about how much he values people. Most people will say a lot about loving others and profess friendship every now and then but, they will rather not have to share a piece of their life with you. They prefer to exchange pleasantries over the fence than sit down to a cup of tea and a warm friendly chat with you. Keeping a distance from people is a no no for leaders.

Leaders must be fond of guests. That is the sixth requirement for leadership. You don’t lead from a distance, you lead from among the people. Leadership is not for the recluse, or solitary, or for the one who is indifferent to strangers. It is for the one who expresses love in practical ways, the one who puts much value in people and expresses it openly, the one who is willing to let others in and share his life with them. Leadership is reserved only for those who can literally sit at meals with those following them.

Why? You ask. What has food got to do with anything? A lot my dear friend, a gigantic lot! Have you wondered why it’s easier for you as a businessman to close more deals over a meal than over pieces of paper? As a man seeking to get into a lady’s heart haven’t you noticed it’s easier doing that over dinner or launch? If there was a time in your family you used to eat together but now you don’t, tell me, did the house feel better now or then? Do you think it was just for mere religious reasons that Christ instructed the church to continue observing the last supper? Think again! One of the punishments commanded for people who become unrepentantly out of line with Christlike life in the church is that others no longer eat with them on the same table. There must be something about sharing meals isn’t it? Now I have your attention.

When people feel a deep, spiritual and covenant connection with each other, they tend to merge into one. They agree more, get along more, trust more, etc. The truth about sharing meals is deep, I will not go into that here. But here is what we need to know for the benefit of the sixth requirement for leadership; the easiest and fastest way to connect with people is by showing genuine value for them. Show them that you take them as you take yourself. Show them that you trust them.
Every leader must know how to cultivate genuiness, sincerity, friendship, a sense and feeling of family among his people. Without this, he is not fit for leadership.


A bishop then must be blameless, the husband of one wife, temperate, sober-minded, of good behavior, hospitable, able to teach; (I Timothy 3:2 NKJV)

People don’t really care what you say, it’s what you do that really move them. People soon recover from the spell of a motivational speaker, but centuries will come and go and people will still be inspired and moved by the remarkable acts of leaders, heroes and ordinary people living up to what they believe in. The fifth requirement for leadership is “Good Behaviour”.
Now, the word behaviour speak of patterns. It talks about your personal culture, your established way of life, your normal response to things that seek your attention, both from within you, like your emotions and thoughts, and from your environment, like the actions of people towards you, or the process that lead to what you want. We are talking about the signature you append on life and the issues in it.

That signature must be good judging by where it is you are supposed to be leading the people to. Every leader must be of good behaviour. It makes all the difference. Leaders need to be disciplined in their conduct, well mannered in interaction, collected and calculated in action, cool headed and courteous in reaction, the list goes on. In summary, leaders are supposed to “show how it’s done here”.

Often leaders underestimate the effect of their behavioural patterns on their ability to lead others. They fail to see how their personal life happen to be of any business to those they lead. A lot of leaders, at that moment they accept the responsibility to lead, do not fully understand what they just did.
More often, LEADERS THINK THEY ACCEPTED A RESPONSIBILITY TO “TELL(explain) AND TELL(instruct)” PEOPLE WHAT TO DO, when in reality, THEY ACTUALLY ACCEPTED A RESPONSIBILITY TO “SHOW(exemplify) AND TELL(invite)” PEOPLE WHAT TO DO. The words in parenthesis describe how followers interpret each approach in the sub conscious. A general who issues commands on the battle field commands more respect and loyalty than the one who breathes fire from the safety and comfort of his Manhattan penthouse.

The truth is really simple and there for everyone to see; followers follow! The shepherd is always in front while the sheep follow closely behind them. So, the question then is; dear leader, where are your followers following you to?


A bishop then must be blameless, the husband of one wife, temperate, sober-minded, of good behavior, hospitable, able to teach; (I Timothy 3:2 NKJV)

Lead yourself first. By being circumspect leaders are able to connect with their followers on three different levels; practically, emotionally and subconsciously. This gives them tremendous mobilising power over those who follow them. It makes it easy to follow them and fulfilling for those who follow them, because these people can already interact with their expectations and destination by just following the leader.

Now, to achieve this level of effectiveness in leadership, leaders must be able to lead themselves first. This is the fourth requirement of leadership; self-leadership or self-control. Leaders must be able to control their natural impulses, manage their emotions well, wield their opinions skilfully, handle themselves with finesse in the affairs of life and very importantly remember to think first. For a leader there is little value in haste, if any at all. Be spontaneous not hasty. Act fast but think first. Don’t go with the flow, choose your rhythm. Set goals and targets for yourself ahead of the group you’re leading, make personal choices that will bring you to those targets and prevail upon yourself to follow through.

Your life needs leadership and you are the one to provide it. John Maxwell is a great expert on leadership, he will tell you this, effective leaders know how to lead themselves first before leading others.
In leading, the important thing is not covering distance, the important thing is gaining ground. So today, try focusing on how much of the journey you have mastered for yourself, rather than how farther up the ladder you are compared to the people under you.

Remember this always, about self-control, it’s about knowing how to drive yourself if you were a car, knowing your buttons and how to push them for the required result. It’s about self-navigation. It’s about keeping yourself on course, in line, and on point.